The fight.

"I will waste my life,

I'll be tested and tried.

With no regrets inside of me,

Just to find I'm at your feet,

Let me find I'm at your feet.

"I leave my father's house, and 

I leave my Mother.

I leave all I have known, and

I'll have no other.

"For I am in love with you,

and there is no cost.

I am in love with you,

and there is no loss.

I am in love with you,

I want to take your name.

I am in love with you,

I want to cling to you," 

(Misty Edwards).

Those lyrics filled the room as we shared our first dance.  You carried me then.  You carry me today.  It's been six years today, but it feels like a lifetime.  

We washed each other's feet and promised to devote our lives to serving one another.  To make every effort to love like Jesus.  To die to ourselves each day--to give up, to surrender, to sacrifice--in order to lift up the other.  

We vowed that we would fight for love.  That we would fight for the covenant we made.  We vowed that we would fight through good times and hard times.  That we would fight through sickness and health.  That we would fight to the end. 

And we sure have fought.

For a while there, in that valley low, even face-to-face, we forgot that we were fighting for each other.  Facing each other became like a face-off.  We faced each other like enemies, instead of like friends.  We attacked each other, instead of attacking the problems that came against us.  We forgot what we were fighting for.  

We tried to change each other.  We both thought we were right.  We forgot that we were perfectly designed gifts from God for each other.  That we are an incredible team because of our differences, not in spite of them.  

"We" became "I."  I felt unheard.  I felt unnoticed.  I felt unloved.  But I forgot.

I forgot that it isn't about me trying to fight to get something from you--it's about me fighting to give everything to you.  I forgot that love requires me to assume the best about you.  I forgot that I am a sinner who needs forgiveness just like you--and that I can hurt you deeply without meaning to.  And in my forgetfulness--in my selfish sinful pride--I was really hurting you.  I forgot to be your biggest fan--even when I feel too weak to cheer for you.  I forgot how to be your safe place--to always protect you in the way I speak about you and speak to you.  To maintain hope in you and for you and with you.  To always trust in you and with you and because of you.  To always persevere--to know that because of Jesus, we will win.  We will make it.  We will conquer.  We will fight through.

God used wise and loving counselors who helped us to remember.  Who helped us to die to ourselves.   Who helped us to listen and really hear.  Who helped us to see.  Face-to-face in the way we once did.  When we washed each other's feet.  When we made our vows.  And we began to see each other better than we ever had seen before.  And our love became stronger than we ever could have imagined it being.

This day is a landmark.  It's the day that will always remind us of where we started.  And, this year, it's the day that we will remember as the entrance to a season of new beginnings.  Through the fight.  Beyond the fight.  Back into the good fight.  We will fight for each other.  We will fight through.  I pray that we will never forget.  That we will fight to stay at each other's feet.  That we will fight to always serve, give, die to ourselves, and love.  That we will fight to always protect, always trust, always hope, always persevere.  

Happy anniversary.